Boxes are Bad

I always enjoy hearing about my ancestors, the people who are responsible for much of who I am. It’s interesting to stop and think about how people who we never knew passed on traits and habits (both good and bad) from one generation to the next. Not long ago my wife and I made the couple hour trip to visit my last surviving grandparents. They are quite the interesting couple full of love and caring. It was a treat for us to just sit and visit as we don’t get to do that very often. They talked to us about how my grandmother “chased” and finally caught my grandfather through careful planning of picnics. My great aunt, who was my grandma’s little sister, was also their visiting and of course had to tell us how my grandmother dropped her ought of a baby stroller when she was just an infant and never told their mother about it and how my grandfather chased her away from the house with a knife while he was babysitting cause she wasn’t suppose to be there. Grandpa was quick to add that she was causing trouble and it was just a little pocket knife.

The memories continued and covered all kinds of things from Grandpa getting out of Vietnam just before the war started to stories of my dad as child breaking his toe while playing soccer in the house after being told to stop and receiving no sympathy from Grandma. He ended up going down the street to my great grandparent’s house (his mom’s parents) to get help from his grandfather who was both blind and a chiropractor. My great grandparents must have been quite the special people hearing all the stories about them. They didn’t have much money but Grandma says they still never felt bad about it as there was plenty of love in their large family (12 kids) and they always set aside some money for those who had less. My great aunt said that whenever they would start complaining to their dad he would just ignore them and start singing till they stopped.

What really struck me though was something that my great aunt told me that my great grandmother would say. “Never put anyone in a box. Give them room for God to work with.” That’s some pretty hard advice to live by as it’s almost human nature to try to categorize people on first impressions and other experiences. I know I struggle with this constantly as there are people who I just don’t particularly enjoy. Even in my short life I’ve seen that we don’t live in a vacuum and the person I am today is very different then the one I was even a few years back. It’s easier to see myself changing then others though especially if they have hurt me. Now I’m sure my great grandparents weren’t perfect but the amazing thing is that from all accounts I have heard they really treated everyone they knew with this positive attitude. Hopefully my wife and I can someday pass along the same attitude about people to our own family.